Category: Infoproduct
Why It’s Worth Fighting Your Dragons And Start Public Speaking!
This article talks about why you should learn and improve your speaking in public skills and tells of a personal journey and how that journey has benefited the author and changed, not only his life, but also that of many people he has coached.
Everyone hears about being nervous when speaking, and when you overcome it, you
become confident and very successful.
What you don’t hear from successful speakers is about the journey itself.
For example, when I started in the field of speaking, I was a corporate employee.
As a project engineer, I had to develop concepts and designs to solve problems within the plant.
I was good at this and yet my career progress was slow because I simply couldn’t speak well,
and I needed to present my proposals to obtain funding.
I would become nervous, tongue tied and confused.
So when I started my public speaking career I was so scared and terrified, that even the
thought of being in front of a group of people, made me feel physically sick, and would
make my heart race so much, I thought I was having a heart attack.
Clearly, I didn’t want to go through my life like that so I did some training and got ready
for my Maiden speech.
With this speech I was competing for a prestigious Silver Cup and I was excited because
I thought I was going to win it.
I walked out onto the stage in front of 200 people and arrived at the podium.
Suddenly my legs started to shake so much I thought I was going to fall down.
So I grabbed the lectern, which also began to shake, and then, at that moment, the butterflies
in my stomach turned into dive-bombers and I started to feel sick.
While shaking the lectern so much, I watched with horror, as my notes slid onto the floor.
In total confusion now, I decide to start my speech without picking up the notes.
My voice quavered as I stated my name, and then my mind went completely blank.
After what seemed an eternity, I grabbed my notes from the floor and fled the stage.
All I achieved that day was to let people know who I was and that I was one pathetic speaker.
Needless to say , I didn’t get the prize or even a polite or sympathetic applause from the audience.
It was such a horrifying experience that I had to make a decision to quit or do something about it.
(I was unable to get into the witness protection program to lose my identity!)
Well I studied, practised and used everything that I write about in my book and then some
12 months later, I had to give a speech on behalf of my company.
Now this was a seriously major important speech for the company and me.
If I didn’t do a brilliant job, my career would finish, the company would suffer and I reckon
I would have been out of a job.
That would mean, a massive change in lifestyle for my family, changing schools, changing
houses and even putting my food supply at risk..
So as I walked to the Podium this time I could feel this huge pressure bearing down on me.
And do you know?
I was confident, created humour and had them laughing, created pathos so they could feel
sad, lifted them with excitement, spoke a very clear message, had them in the palm of my hand
and when I finished ,they stood up to applaud.
Pretty good eh?
Oh yes, I got promoted and realised that day, that being a great public speaker helps you make
more money, no matter what your job is.
So what made the difference?
What transformed me from bumbling idiot to charismatic speaker?
And could anybody do the same?
Clearly, the answer is yes, if they went through all the stuff they I had.
Why am I qualified to say this?
Because it is based upon my learnings, my studies, my experiments, good and bad, and
most importantly, on my real life, in the fire, under the hammer, experience.
And then I even wrote my own book on how to overcome the Fear of Public Speaking!
As Chairman of the Public Speaking Group at the Australian Institute of Management I have
coached and helped many people who at the beginning of the year , could not even say their
name, and by the end of the year, had become articulate and confident speakers.
So overcoming the fear and building the skills, step by step, not only transforms your
presentation skills, it builds your confidence in all parts of your life.
And isn’t that a good enough reason to start!
Please fill in the The Complete Speaking Business Assessment for free assessment
More info’s and free registrations (restricted to pros), please join our live seminar
You’re Always Public Speaking So Be Prepared
The funny thing about presenting and public speaking is that the majority of people will tell you they don’t enjoy it and/or aren’t very good at it. And yet regardless of who they are and what they do, most of the speaking they do on a day-to-day basis IS public speaking.
You see, mostly when we talk to ourselves we keep it as an internal dialogue that nobody else can hear. But whenever we open our mouths and actually make a noise in front of another person we’re speaking in public hence “public speaking”. So why do so many people find it so scary?
I think it’s the eyes. All those sets of eyes fixed on you….. BORING into you. It’s unsettling. So would it be any easier if your audience was ignoring you and all looking the other way? What if they all dozed off so it WAS as if you were talking to yourself? (Have you ever been a Rotary after-dinner speaker?)
Whatever the reason, the fact is that before getting up to speak, even the most seasoned professional will have some butterflies, whether they choose to call the feeling nervousness or excitement doesn’t really matter. Rest assured, we all experience it to some degree.
If I had one tip to pass on, if I was asked to tell you the most important lesson I’ve learnt over the years I’ve been presenting, it would have to be to stress the absolute necessity of being totally prepared.
Now this may sound obvious and I’m sure you’ve heard this before, possibly many times, and like a lot of important messages it tends to become diluted the more we hear it “Oh yes, I knew that, now what else?”.
And yet, knowing this, some people will be outside in the car park seconds before they have to deliver their sales pitch scribbling it out on the back of a business card. I know, I’ve been there.
When I talk about being prepared, I mean you should know your talk off by heart. You should be able to give it verbatim, standing on your head, without even having to think about what comes next.
Now some of you may be thinking “Yes, but I don’t work like that. I like to keep the spontaneityî or ìYes, but I want to tailor my talk to the occasionî or ìYes, but that would be boring because I’d just be on auto pilot.î
But actually, that’s not what happens. In effect, the opposite is true. When you know your talk by rote, it gives you the freedom to change it around, to add, to subtract without losing your direction. It’s like driving from A to B. If your route is set from the outset and you know it well, you can safely veer off and browse in a few antique shops and have a pub lunch in a picturesque village off the beaten track and still get back to where you were to complete your journey. But, if you’d just set off in the general direction with no main route to which to return, you’d soon get lost if you were to be diverted and you’d have difficulty picking up that thread again.
You see, there are so many things out there that can throw the speaker, and lots of unexpected things can occur when you’re dealing with the public. No matter how good you are, you will become distracted, so knowing your material to the nth degree is absolutely crucial.
If something happens that needs your attention, you’ll have to stop and deal with it, but you can return to your talk with barely a glitch and appear calm, collected and hence the ultimate professional.
You see we all get nervous. We all stick our feet in our mouths sometimes. We don’t ever operate in a hermetically sealed environment, especially when exposed to other humans. But prepare, prepare and over-prepare and not only will you enjoy the confidence of knowing that nothing can phase you because you know your material, but if you’re forced off your chosen route for any reason you can return smoothly and appear to be the consummate professional speaker.
And after all, if you can’t or won’t speak about your business, who will?
Please fill in the The Complete Speaking Business Assessment for free assessment
More info’s and free registrations (restricted to pros), please join our live seminar
What Makes a Good Speaker?
When people hear that I owned a national, professional speakers bureau for 13 years, they often ask me, who are the best speakers and why? What follows are some of the characteristics of a very successful speaker who is often a highly paid speaker.
ëTell’ em what you’re going to tell them, tell them, and then tell’ em what you told them.î
1.They arrive early and check out the sound system and introduce themselves to audience members during the networking time.
2.They speak on a subject that their audience needs to hear. And they use words and body language that shows their passion and authenticity.
3.They connect with their audience in the first few minutes with a riveting story, a funny incident, a startling statement or perhaps a poem. They know how to make their opening remarks relate to the material that follows.
4. They have no fear. They don’t only say what the audience wants to hear, but what they NEED to hear. In other words, their remarks may raise some eyebrows. They give their audiences some fresh ideas.
5.They never make more than 3-4 points in their speech. They don’t feel the need to tell an audience everything they know. No one can retain it all. For each major point they tell an illustrative story. A good story evokes emotion and offers a lesson. The audience members are then only a step away from their own story.
6. They make great eye contact and make each person feel attended to. This makes them appear to be more heartfelt and really present for their audience.
7. Before closing, they summarize and reiterate their major points. They end with an inspiring story and a call to action. They hold the audience accountable ñ to take some action in the next few days, weeks.
8.They don’t talk too long. They know how much time they have been assigned and they don’t exceed it.
9.They rehearse their speech a few times but never sound canned. They NEVER read their speech verbatim.
10. All successful speakers market themselves. They all promote themselves. And they all Network. They are a model of excellence. And you can be too!
Please fill in the The Complete Speaking Business Assessment for free assessment
More info’s and free registrations (restricted to pros), please join our live seminar
How To Communicate In His Love Language
Are you wondering how to communicate with that new man in your life? Or maybe you are just wondering about the next man in your life? New or old, it’s never too late to learn how to communicate in the language of love.
Maybe you’ve seen the tomboyish girl that somehow has men flocking around her. If you stopped turning green with envy for a moment, you’d notice why she was a man magnet. She just sort of fit herself into him, like a piece of a jigsaw puzzle that he didn’t even know was missing.
Instead of rolling your eyes at that dazed and happy-in-love look he has on his face, why not look into how she did it? Learn these tips on how to communicate in a whole new way by getting to know his love language and speaking it fluently!
We all know that love is built on the solid foundation of communication. When we are in love we are on the same page as our lover. It’s a special level of communication that people in love have.
Some call it chemistry, but really, in order to even get to the chemistry stage you need to know his love language. For a clue as to what that might be, we need to understand how he relates to the world around him.
Everyone perceives their world with three senses – sight, sound and feelings. Psychologists have discovered that even though we use all three senses, one of these senses is always more pronounced. It doesn’t mean that it replaces the others, but if you pay attention, the more dominant one will reveal itself to you.
Asking questions is the easiest and fastest way to learn his language and since asking questions is the most common way to get to know someone or start a conversation, he’ll never suspect.
He’s just returned from a business trip. You ask about his trip. Pay attention to his answer:
1. If he’s visual he might say: the weather was terrible. I didn’t get to see the sun once!
2. An auditory guy will talk about sounds: we got the account, which was good. But the hotel I stayed at was too noisy.
3. He is a feeler if he answers something like: I have to admit; I’m not much into traveling alone. I get lonely when I visit new places.
Knowing a man’s love language is the key in how to communicate with him in a way that will make him feel that you are the missing piece to his puzzle. You’ll just fit. Of course, one question isn’t going to tell you. You’ll have to watch for a pattern to emerge.
Once you do find the prominent sense, you’ll want to speak his language. Talking with your visual man will be all about what you saw on the way over, while the auditory fellow will want to know about the new CD you just bought.
It doesn’t matter what your love language is. As long as you know how to communicate to him in his Love Language you’ll soon be the envy of all the other girls. That is, unless you tell them your secret.
Please fill in the The Complete Speaking Business Assessment for free assessment
More info’s and free registrations (restricted to pros), please join our live seminar
Public Speaking, Why All The Fuss?
When asked, the majority of people in the US would claim that there greatest fear is getting up in front of a crowd and giving a speech. People 100 years ago would not say that public speaking was their worst fear, but they had more threatening things to worry about right? Iím talking about things like war, and wild animals, and rampant crime without great law enforcement. The fact that our society is more tame is perhaps part of this strange fear of a relatively benign circumstance but doesnít explain it entirely. I want to discuss why we are so afraid and measures that can be taken to put our fears to rest.
So why are we so afraid of public speaking? Well for one thing not very many of us are good at it and we donít know how to get better. Public oration was a skill highly valued in the past and therefore it was something that was worked on with much effort and time in school. Part of the reason that more people that were schooled in speech making in the past was because school was really only for those to whom the skill would be beneficial. What I am trying to get at is that only the ‘gifted’ children were formally trained in such skills and the rest of kids worked on the far and never had the need to make a speech. With the requirement of grade school, and the assumption of a college education, there are more people than ever that, in my opinion, shouldnít be there in the first place and will never use the skills they may gain in the second.
So first we are not good at it, second we donít for the most part need to do it regularly, and third as mention in the first paragraph threatening has taken on a whole new definition in this relatively safe society. So why are people called on to do public speaking that donít have the natural skills, desires, or regular practice that they need to be good? Well that is a function of the vast middle class in this country who think they are good enough to carry on the traditions of the rich and famous, but who lack the upbringing and training that make a person truly gifted in the art of public speaking. Famous examples would be graduation addresses, wedding tosts, eulogies, etc. We, I think, expect too much of ourselves and therefore are definitely afraid of the inevitably horrible job that we are going to do?
My answer? Well either imagine all the horrible things that are much worse than the agony of embarrassment. Or you could actually take the time to get trained (not recommended unless your job requires that you do it all the time). Or you could just give up on the senseless traditions of the past that were required of people that were much better trained to do public speaking.
Please fill in the The Complete Speaking Business Assessment for free assessment
More info’s and free registrations (restricted to pros), please join our live seminar
How To Communicate Better With Body Language Secrets
“I don’t let my mouth say nothin’ my head can’t stand.” Louis Armstrong
Since the 1970’s, learning how to communicate better has had a lot to do with understanding body language.
Julius Fast wrote a book entitled, Body Language in 1970. He talked about a new science called Kinesics. It opened the way to more studies and books on the subjects. Today, the term Body Language is very common and understood as an important element of communication.
In fact, experts in the field of communication suggest that there is a rule that says that 7% of the meaning of what a person is saying comes from their words.
Interestingly, 38% is based on the tone of their voice. 55% of the meaning comes from the body language of the person that is speaking. This rule comes from research that was published in the late 1960’s.
Some now think that the percentages from this research might be slightly different. Nevertheless, the bottom line is still the same. If you don’t know the basics of body language, you are missing a valuable tool for learning how to communicate better. We speak body language on a subliminal level, without actually realizing that we are communicating through body talk.
1. Face
The most expressive part of your body is your face. When you enter a room if you feel nervous, your expression might make you look aloof or unfriendly.
Smiling at the room is a sure-fire way to remove anyone’s doubts about your approachability. Smiling makes us look warm, open and confident.
2. Eyes
They say the eyes are the windows to the soul. They certainly give people clues about what we are feeling.
A direct gaze towards someone can show interest- direct staring on the other hand can mean an intense dislike. Very little eye contact can show that you are shy.
3. Hands
Have you ever watched someone’s hand gestures when they are talking? Open hand gestures tend to make a person appear open and honest. Bringing hands together to a point can accent the point you are making.
Wringing your hands or excessively moving your fingers and hands will give away nervousness. It can even make someone look dishonest- are they trying to hide something?
4. Posture
If you lean towards someone you are showing an interest in that person. If we are feeling low in confidence, we tend to slouch our shoulders and look down.
Men and women use different body language. For instance, women will stand close to each other, hold eye contact with the person they are talking to and use gestures.
Men make little effort to maintain eye contact and don’t rely on the use of gestures to communicate. Men and women can learn how to communicate better by observing the differences in their use of body language.
Please fill in the The Complete Speaking Business Assessment for free assessment
More info’s and free registrations (restricted to pros), please join our live seminar
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